Monday, March 31, 2014

Caption This Picture #1

For all of you aspiring humorists and fanfic writers, I thought (with inspiration from our very own WTFisastarship) we could get a Caption This Picture series started.

The rules are simple: Be as elaborate as you want with your title/caption/story, as long as it kinda sorta makes sense in the context of the picture or gif. The best submission in the comments section will win glory and internet fame!!

This week's inaugural picture is this:


Feel free to send in your own ambiguous pictures for us to caption or use as inspiration for the next great ficlet. The more ambiguous the better, lol.

[AYSLT] JUUNO feat. Zitten



JUUNO is the producer/composer of the song while Zitten (짙은) is the vocalist. Props to urmomisafail for tweeting this song. A few people may like it on here.

Sunday, March 30, 2014

Welcoming The New AKF Authors!

If you guys have noticed by now, we have added three new authors from the latest application period. You can read Krakenoid's first article here, following along with the excruciating suffering Krakenoid suffered while reviewing the music video. The Duchess' first article is here, teasing us with an awesome concept for a fanfic before reviewing a fanfic that a fangirl actually wrote. Please, someone get on that Eunjung, Yuri, and Ailee fanfic! WTFisastarship started off with consoling everyone here, gracing us with gifs of Sexica's body for everyone lamenting the loss of Yuri's glorious thighs.

For the three new authors, you can give a self-introduction in the comments below and can answer some questions from the readers.

Sexica Appreciation

I searched the deep depths of Tumblr and finally came across something that was at least decently interesting. And what was that, you may ask? Sexica Jessica's boobs. And the rest of her. So to cheer everyone up after the sad loss of Yuri's thighs here's a post honoring the gorgeous body of Jessica Jung.



A Tribute to Yuri's Thighs

Thank you fiddle.se

Yuri's thighs have died recently. The loss hit me hard and I'm deeply struggling with finding healthy methods of coping. To help myself move on, I have created this small tribute video dedicated to what was once but is no more.

Luhan Doesn't Like The Dark Girls

MFW a dark skinned girl asks me out.
This is the latest "oppa doesn't prefer some of my traits, so he's a racist asshole" crusade going on.

Saturday, March 29, 2014

Fancam Appreciation #7 - Nine Muses' Kyungri



I'm part of the minority that think Kyungri's eyes are fucking weird as shit, but hey, great body. I was overcome Jiyeon's eye last year, so in due time I will be able to overcome Kyungri's frog eyes, as long as her body continues being jjangbak.

Friday, March 28, 2014

Fanfic Fridays: Beyond Repair

I don't read fanfiction, at all. Even if it's lesbian fanfiction about Ailee, Yuri and Eunjung licking whipped cream off of each other...


Actually... I might just read that.

Kim Tae Hee For InStyle



God, Kim Tae Hee looks amazing. Good thing in Yeseulology, you're allowed to worship other deities, such as Kim Tae Hee.

I wrote this last Saturday, and we're going through a little dead period, basically just waiting for A Pink to make a comeback because I scoured Netizen Buzz and Soompi and didn't find anything to write about. Seriously, this is the fifth article in the past week about a photo shoot. Yes, a lot of great photo shoots have come out, but I really didn't feel like writing about SNSD and 2NE1 trading wins on Music Shows.

Thursday, March 27, 2014

A Reminder Of Why This Site Exists


To post pictures of incredibly attractive Korean idols and actresses...

Way's Girls

K-pop excels at remaking entertainment from the west - some of the best k-pop songs are direct copies of western songs, and all k-pop is at the very least extremely western-influenced.  So please enjoy this reconfiguration of a classic western tale, Kpopalypse style.

cpway

well apparently boram has the biggest and most misshapen tits in t-ara (NSFW)


Color me surprised.


Future Livestreams

Due to working the night shift, I will no longer be able to livestream on Fridays and Saturdays at 8 PM EST like I normally did. However, I can do livestreams in the afternoons, such as 3 PM EST, five hours than I normally would. I know that conflicts with a good majority of the people who regularly tune in, because that would be 3-5 AM in their timezone. I thought about uploading videos to YouTube, but some people told me that most of the fun with the livestreams is the interactivity. Well, I can't stream during the week at 8 PM to accommodate people because that would be around 8 AM their time. If you have any other suggestions, comment below, because the only other alternative I can think of is just waiting for Kpopalypse and/or Zaku to stream.

Fuck Eunji For Overshadowing Everyone Else


Yeah, I know this is a little tough to read, but squint hard enough and you'll be able to read the whole thing.

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Jooyeon To Join MBC Drama 'A New Leaf'


Jooyeon joins the cast of the drama 'A New Leaf', headlined by Kim Myung Min and Park Min Young. 

Bom's Fanart


It was a normal day and I had just finished looking at Zinger/Hana's new face. For comparative purposes I decided to look up some pictures of Bom. This is what came out of that. Not going to lie, I don't mind real Bom as much anymore.

P.S: Sorry if your work got posted!
Before we start, a semi normal picture and the jump. 

Kim So Yeon For Marie Claire


Marie Claire is shitting all over the other magazines this month.

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Yoonji video teaser: Inspiring-boners concept



Oh, Yoonji... a little bit more, you ask?


These Women Don't Want Oppar

Majority of insecure fangirls seem to have a problem with female groups because they're afraid that girl group members are fucking oppar in S. Tiger's love van. Not going to lie, this is probably the truth, but a new girl group may gain many female fans because they won't be screwing oppar. Why? Because they're all married. 

"Hey you fat fangirls, we actually have lives"


I don't care about the marital status of idols because it's not my problem, so they can do what they want. Other people who like them probably won't mind the fap materials either. However, nettys may see this as a way to insult these women and say they're too old or they should be at home in the kitchen, because hey, nettys can be sexist. 

Girl Hood(because woman hood seemed like they took it from 50sog) debuted with a sickly sweet cute concept that I just couldn't like with a song called "Honey sweetie I love you." The video starts off unpromising with a little interview thing featuring the women as they're walking off somewhere. Then it fades and we get a cheap black and white montage of the group members waving their arms dancing to the tune, which is annoyingly mellow. Cue the random close ups and the bad lipsyncing before we start seeing the ladies embrace some guy with a ponytail. Take this process, add some outfit changes and a lot of 'honey,' 'i love you' and 'you you you' and you've got yourself the most boring thing you've ever watched.




Did I mention the one with the ponytail scares the living shit out of me?

This song could easily be the worst K-pop song I clicked on so far this year. The background music is reminiscent of old-school elevator music and the lyrics are boring and repetitive. Their voices also bug me a lot, it's like they're trying to force a shit ton of aegyo down your throat, which only works if you're trying to sing this to a little kid. The dance is more just them moving thei hips, stepping from side to side and waving their arms everywhere. Since they are all mature women, I was kind of expecting a sexier concept because they could work it well, and it could satisfy all those fans with MILF fetishes sexy probably would work better for them because this shit sounds like a fucking lullaby or something.

If you do come back again do us a favor and sing a song, not something a kindergarten music class might learn.

BoA Doesn't Have 'The Face' For Acting


I have always considered BoA to be one of the better looking girls in Korea, so I've been confused whenever I read that she doesn't have the face for acting. Sure, I don't hold BoA in the same regard as Han Ye Seul, but I would still give BoA a 9/10 on the celebrity visual scale.

Monday, March 24, 2014

Why Hwallo There, Ma'am

God bless Wellmade StarM. Leaving T-ara was prolly the best thing that happened to the Hwayoungster.


More after the jump.

Korean Netizens Want Lee Ji Ah To Apologize On Behalf Of Her Grandfather


In the latest WTF news being thrown out there, Korean netizens are hating all over Lee Ji Ah...because what her grandfather did over 70 years ago. No, I can't make shit like this up.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Bah Humbug: Is KPop Really on the Decline?

The other day, I was asked this uncharacteristically deep/complex question by an anon from my ask.fm (which is here btw):
Lots of people have been saying kpop is on the decline from 2009-2012. What do you think they mean by that, and do you agree?
I decided to turn it into a full article/editorial because, hey. If Kpoppalypse can do one of these and generate some good commentary and introspective reflection instead of a deadzone of "l0l no1kara", why don't I try?


Warning: Very long and picture/video heavy post ahead, beware!!

Lee Yeon Hee For Harper's Bazaar


Friday, March 21, 2014

Han Ye Seul For Marie Claire


Great day for followers of Yeseulology. I recently set up the religion and we've already been blessed with a new photo shoot.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

AKF Is Hiring


Did you apply to have a job Kim Tae Hee's underwear but woke up from a dream and realized that such a job doesn't exist? Well, the second best job out there doesn't pay any money but is awesome anyway is being a writer for Anti Kpop-Fangirl. Back in December I wrote a post about how there will be changes to AKF starting this year, but the changes started a little bit later than I expected. 

Mandy Wei Dancing To Rania's Dr. Feel Good



Skip to 1:49 for Mandy's part. I've always hated the song (as it gives me headaches because of that beeping noise), but now I hate the song a little less.

And remember folks, just because I post pictures/videos of hot Taiwanese chicks, it doesn't mean I'm pro anorexia. It just means that I think they're hot.

Apparently SM is being accused of massive tax evasion lol


The website segye.com is reporting that SM has been evading a shit load of taxes through creative loopholes such as creating a singer named "SM Entertainment" in Hong Kong and funneling money through that, among other stuff. Apparently this isn't the first time such accusations have been made against the company such as in 2003 but nothing really came of it. The 19th Seoul Regional Tax Authority and the IRS have been investigating SM for a while now and have discovered that over 30 SM employees have been evading taxes worth a couple USD tens of millions of won.

There are rampant rumors regarding the SM Annual General Meeting being held today/tomorrow (3/21). It does seem convenient these rumors would show up now of all times. 

At any rate we can only speculate what effect this will have on the Suju M comeback. 

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

All Hail Hyomin


Yoona Shows Some 'Skin' For Pictorial


Misleading title? Yeah, I'd have to say so.

I'm back from my trip to Haiti already, as the government kicked me out for trying to pass off a woman as a god. The government told me it was blasphemous, so promoting Yeseulology didn't work out so well.

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Sunye Is The Ultimate Troll


Last year, Sohee left JYP Entertainment to focus on acting, but Sunye resigned with JYP Entertainment, giving fans some hope there would be future group activities. Lol nope.

POSITIVE post: 3 people who I like in k-pop right now

I've recently been alerted to the fact that some people think my k-pop blogging is "negative" and that I'm just hating on everything I can for cheap jokes and generally getting off on being a rude and unpleasant person.  Gosh, what a strange perception.  This is obviously untrue as clearly someone who genuinely hated k-pop wouldn't spend so much time writing about it, so why are some people so easily confused about this?

cond

NS Yoon G Comeback Teaser


The song could suck ass and I wouldn't care. I'm already hyped for her comeback.

Monday, March 17, 2014

Toheart (Woohyun & Key) - Delicious

)


SM teamed up Woohyun and Key to make an inter-group subunit...all for the sake of brainwashing teenage fangirls into swallowing for their oppas. If love is delicious and nutritious, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that love was substituted for 'jizz' in the song. I think this is a great marketing campaign from SM, as it explains the virtues of girls swallowing oppar's cum not because of the taste, but because of the health benefits.

Sunday, March 16, 2014

[MV Review] 4Minute "Whatcha Doin' Today?"

What are you? My mom? Stop asking me so many questions, 4Minute.


Soooo glad Hyuna's not my mom. For so many reasons.


[Warning: This post contains lots of big pictures and at least one very bright, fast gif*.]

How To Learn Korean (Or Any Other Language) Part 3

There's no witty caption this time. Kim Tae Hee is just amazingly hot.

Back in December, I wrote parts 1 and 2 to this series, but there's plenty left to cover. Those two parts can be seen as to getting a start, but no real path as to learning the language. Part three will specifically deal with how to self-study without any access to people to help you and for people who want to learn, but don't have a lot of time and/or the will to turn it into a big commitment.

Bom's Face


I don't know whether to be an asshole and laugh at her or to be human for a change and feel sorry for her. Well, Bom's obviously not human anymore, and that means I don't have to be human, so I'll be an asshole and laugh at her.

Look at CL. She's laughing at Bom, too. 

BoA Sings The Theme Song To Fairy Tail 2014



In a random act of managing, Avex decided to actually put some effort into promoting BoA this year by having her new song Masayume Chasing be the tie in theme song for the continuation of the Fairy Tail anime series.

[MV Review] Ga-in - Truth or Dare

)


Ga-in released Truth or Dare last month and I totally overlooked it because of all of the attention given to Fxxk U, on top with the fact that Sunmi also came back. I embedded the performance version above, but if you wish to view the full music video, click here. The MV review will be based off of the full music video.

Saturday, March 15, 2014

Cherry Blossom Ending Challenge



The song is rising back into the top 10 on the charts again, so it's yet another year where we have to hear about how 'great' this song is. I propose a challenge. How long can you listen to the song without wanting to kill yourself?

Dahye


Stop the Lizzy Duckface

Bear witness to the undeniable beauty that is After School/Orange Caramel's Lizzy.

lizzynon1

One of the most attractive women in k-pop, this resource of precious fap material is under threat.
 

Fancam Appreciation #5 - Hello Venus' Ara, 4minute's Hyuna



I watch Hello Venus fancams to avoid Ara's Frankenstein face, but apparently she has a lot of fans. For those of you with monster fetishes, here you go. Ray also linked me to some Hyuna fancams...and I'm not really a fan of hers either, but I know I'm also in the minority there, so you can find those fancams after the jump.

Friday, March 14, 2014

Tiffany Is The Lard Ass In SNSD

4minute - Come In Teaser

[MV Review] CNBlue - Can't Stop



Amidst all of the SNSD/2NE1 comeback wars, everyone forgot that CNBlue was making a comeback, including myself. While going back and looking for music that come out recently, I saw that CNBlue came out something new and realized that I didn't even recall seeing any teasers or news about their comeback. Talk about coming back at a bad time.

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Ladies Code's Zuny Is So Cute



Now I actually have to pay attention to Ladies Code. I better get accustomed to all of the vocal masturbation and obnoxious yelling in their songs.

[MV Review] Spica - You Don't Love Me

I was going to scrap this review after lagging on it for so long, but I made gifs already... Might as well not let them go to waste.



[MV Review] BESTie - Thank You Very Much



I've been listening to this song since it has come out, but I've been conflicted, as it took a while to decide how I truly feel about the song.

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Kpopalypse Interview - Arcadey

kpopalypseinterview

Welcome to the first Kpopalypse interview!

In this post I’m going to be interviewing Jacques Peterson, the owner/writer of pop website Arcadey and writer for pop-culture website Popdust.   Jacques’ own website used to be called The Prophet Blog and he’s been writing about K-pop as well as pop from other countries for a long time, much to the pleasure/displeasure of many.  Love him or hate him, if you’ve followed western K-pop blogging over the last few years you’ve probably seen some of his posts and have an opinion about them.  He attracted my attention when the T-ara scandal broke in 2012, where his lucid writing style and refusal to blindly follow the trendy popular opinion of the time shone out to me like a jewel-encrusted beacon in a lake of shit.  In this interview we cover off his views on a wide range of k-pop and blogging-related topics.  Enjoy!

Let's Blame Idols For Everything!

A supporting actor committed suicide, but no, that doesn't matter because people are using this opportunity to take a dump on idols. Yes, because idols forced this guy to commit suicide.

Go get an ice cream cone or some shit to eat, since it's actually higher than 20 degrees Fahrenheit outside for a change.

Monday, March 10, 2014

Cyclops Overlord and Hyomin To Have Solo Albums



While our pals over at Asian Junkie are looking more forward to Hyomin's solo album, I'm sure those of us here at AKF, who are ardent followers of the Cult of Cyclops, are looking more forward to Jiyeon's solo album. If Jiyeon's MV isn't raunchy to the point where it makes Ga-in look like a nun, something will have gone wrong. Also, imagining how batshit crazy that would make Korean netizens is giving me life, because I'm sure they'd be typing their usual shit on Nate with the other hand down their pants.

Jin Se Yeon Criticized...For Working...Yeah...



This video has nothing to do with the actual topic on hand, I just find it cute. Esentially, Jin Se Yeon is getting shit for filming two dramas back to back.

Music Core Episode 400 Highlights



Music Core had its 400th episode this past Saturday and had some special stages worth watching....and some special stages that you wish you never watched. It's always good to see things mixed up because with these music shows, the only thing that keeps me watching them is for the gif-able moments.

Sunday, March 9, 2014

Jay welcomes the D

Jay Park and Simon D have teamed up as co-CEOs of Jay's hip-hop label, AOMG.


Does this make them C.E.Bros?

Han Hye Jin Modeling For...Who Cares


Actress Han Hye Jin is the model for something or other, and yeah, I'm blinded by how perfect she is to even give a shit about what she's even advertising. This is when advertising fails when you don't even know the product and/or its name.

CL Receives Death Threats Over MTBD


And this isn't because the song is fucking terrible, it's because there is supposedly something from the Koran in the song. 

What?

Rainaism - join the new religion of k-pop (and give me money)

The other night was a rough night.

There I was, trying to get to sleep, with little success.  Having lived in Australia my whole life, I'm accustomed to days in a row of 40+ degrees desert heat in summer; it doesn't bother me too much as long as it's cool overnight.  What I struggle with more is when it only gets down to about 30 degrees at night, then it's hard to sleep because there's no real break in the heat.  We're getting more and more nights like that lately, probably from all you kids overseas burning all your carbons fapping to Girl's Day videos.

girldayf

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Fancam Appreciation #4 - Ladies Code's Eunbi



This week's recommendation is Ladies Code's Eunbi, and two people linked me the same fancam, so I know it has to be good. I can see why I was linked to this fancam twice. Great legs and a nice butt. However, the fancam is better on mute, because I don't like any of Ladies Code's songs.

Thursday, March 6, 2014

1PS - Because I'm Your Girl


Another rookie group appears out of nowhere, and I found myself nodding along to the song. The beginning is a little slow, but picks up 20 seconds in and becomes a lot more interesting. I find this to be a pretty strong for a rookie group, as I have witnessed so many failures with debuts (Girl's Day, Rainbow, just to name a couple of names).

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Woohee is probably the sexiest idol right now



If you disagree, I don't care. I also don't care if this is butting in on the scheduled fancam posts. This girl is radiating hot hot sex on fire right now. Just compare her to sweet Ahyoung chillin and being all adorable when they are next to each other. Woohee is not playing games. I mean, some idols may compete for better bod, like perhaps Fei or our Holy Cyclops Savior, but this fire Woohee has lit in herself cannot be denied.

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

K-Girls: Korea's sexiest charity organization

Well at least she isn't CL.
K-Girls, that group composed of former Miss Korea pageant contestants released their second single recently, "Not Bad." Having largely flown under the radar, this release can be excused from being noticed in light of comebacks from SNSD and 2NE1.

[MV Review] SNSD - Mr. Mr.



I heard the song when it came out, but I have yet to watch the music video. I've heard it's bad, but I just hope it isn't so bad that I have to write a fanfic describing how bad it is like I had to with IGAB.

[MV Review] 2NE1 - Don't Come Back Home Ever Again, 2NE1



Well Teddy, the trend of throwing 3-5 songs into one song passed already. I know you were busy fucking Han Ye Seul, but come on man, you're usually not a whole 14 months late on trends in Kpop, especially such shitty trends as mashing multiple incomplete songs into one and calling it a day.

I tried my best to avoid this comeback since, well, I haven't liked anything 2NE1 has released since Hate You. That means they have released a loooot of songs since then that I thought were absolute shit, with the biggest offenders being CL's solo songs. However, I know everyone enjoys my misery, so I'm taking one for the team and reviewing this piece of shit.

Monday, March 3, 2014

[AYSLT] Huckleberry P



Huckleberry P is a solo rapper and also part of the duo Pinodyne. He's been one of my favorite underground hiphop artists over the past few years, releasing one of my favorite albums, Get Backers along with Suda. Enjoy.

It's time for another intervention

(This was originally titled "Why Jeremy Scott is detrimental to youths 'round the world and needs to be stopped," but that was a mouthful.)

About a year ago, I lobbied kpop fans everywhere to stage an intervention for F.T. Island's Lee Hong Ki when he was hitting the nail art pretty hard. Now, it's time to step in and stop another group of idols stuck in a pattern of abuse. Watching one of 2ne1's latest videos, "Happy," made me come to a realization: 2ne1 is too often under the influence — under the influence of Jeremy Scott.



Sunday, March 2, 2014

Consorting with the Enemy

The funniest thing about SNSD and 2NE1 having comebacks at roughly the same time (aside from the songs themselves, those are fucking jokes too) is the amount of back-and-forth wank that flies about on social media. Few things give me more pleasure than cackling at how crazy these fangirls/boys get over something so trivial as popularity contests or music show wins.

However, it seems like SNSD has taken the edge in this competition so far. You know shit has gotten dire for the Blackjack fandom when their biggest fansite/forum posts tweets like this to rally the troops.


Saturday, March 1, 2014

Haiku song reviews - many reviews in one post - can you handle it?

People are always / asking me for all my "thoughts" / about k-pop songs

I normally do / not review songs, I find it / boring as batshit

But due to demand / I will make an exception / and review some songs

Please now enjoy these / Korean pop songs reviews / in Haiku format
 
These are all for songs / that I have been asked for my / "thoughts" on recently

euhan